Ssujata Mehta: There is no domination, or clinging-on in friendship

Actress Ssujata Mehta who has been part of popular projects like Shrikant, Khandaan, Ye Meri Life Hai, Kyaa Hoga Nimmo Kaa and Saraswatichandra, says that when it comes to friendship, there must be no obligation or inequality between the parties. She adds that people must give each other ample space to form a healthy relationship.
 
“In my view, friendship is about giving each other space. It's a kind of relationship that shouldn't involve domination or clinging to each other. It's important to give each other space and support each other in both good and bad times. That's what friendship means to me,” she says.

Talking about her friend, she says, “What makes my friendship with my friend Niloufer Patel special is that we live in the same building and have been friends since childhood. While I have had best friends from different stages of my life—like from school and college—my connection with her is unique because we grew up together. She attended Queen Mary's, and I went to SVM school, so our schools were different. However, we shared a common connection through our society, Devchaya, where we still live in the same building.”

She adds, “Our mothers were close too; her mother, Nagish Patel, and my mother, Rekha Mehta, often chatted with each other. When Niloufer wasn't around, I would spend time with her mother, and she would do the same with mine. We would share meals together and spend time at each other's homes. The special thing about our friendship is that we understand each other without needing constant communication. Even in a group of ten people, a simple glance is enough for us to understand each other.”
Different professions and lives are not in between their friendship, says the actress. “Despite being in different professions—I'm an actor, and she used to work for Cathay Pacific and is now a motivational leader—we share a deep bond. Whether something good or bad happens in my life, I always share it with her. During the COVID lockdown, we even had a sort of common kitchen, cooking together and sharing recipes.”

She adds, “She is a real well-wisher and a very warm-hearted person, always supporting and helping me. For example, she recently came all the way to Ghatkopar to watch my play ‘Sujata Rang Rangili’ for the second time. We have a contrasting nature; she's disciplined and wakes up early, while I have an erratic schedule and love dressing up. But this contrast works well for us.”

Travelling together is also fun, she says, adding, “We've shared many experiences, like our trip to Kailash Mansarovar in 2018. It was meant to be a spiritual retreat, but we ended up having fun like school kids. We're planning to go back for a more spiritual experience. We can talk for hours, but when she needs to sleep, she'll remind me of the time because she wakes up early.”

Doling or tips for a successful friendship, she says, “Don't try to possess or dominate your friend. Be considerate, be a giver, and give each other space, just like in any relationship, whether it's between husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend. This helps maintain a healthy and long-lasting friendship. Also, appreciate each other's differences and support one another.”